


Captured wind

by Alannada



Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Brother-Sister Relationships, Captivity, Gen, Loss, M/M, Utumno
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-18
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-03-13 14:39:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 16,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3385439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alannada/pseuds/Alannada
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[Complete] Manwe's in Utumno and Melkor keeps him locked away. It isn't what the younger twin planned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A thing requested from me on Tumblr. An AU where after the Battle of Powers it is Manwe who's captured by Melkor. But instead of being nasty the Dark Ainu is nice for his younger twin. Like "The Awakening" - it may on may not be continued.

The taste of the food was the same with the taste of the mud, so he wasn't eating it, even if he knew it was the best stew ever. The air in the room was still like in the eye of a tornado. The Breath of Arda, the Lord of Airs was sitting in a comfortable chair, staring at the door. Melkor left him just a second ago, irked that his stubborn younger brother refused to eat. He didn't understand that Manwë felt like a bird in a golden cage. He could make his jail comfortable and full of wonders, but it was still a jail. Manwë by the first time in his existence was unable to go wherever he wanted. He could see how careful with him Melkor was and he was happy to see that, but...  
He wasn't sure what was happening outside of his cell, Melkor didn't want to tell him what was going on. Were others captured too? Were the Children killed? Did Melkor committed an another mistake (Namo would say "sin", but Manwë believed that confused, troubled beings cannot be sinners, they just need help and guidance to frind Eru's grace) and caged them?  
Manwë turned his head to look at a candle burning on a table in a corner of his chamber. He sent a small gust of breeze towards her and the fire danced, causing shadows in the room to follow the unsung melody.  
Melkor wasn't evil, he was stubborn and short-tempered, liked to do things his own way. He had love and care in his heart. He was so gentle to him and tried to show Manwë how much he loves him the whole time Manwë was here, in this room. He came here, left Eru's side to work on the great Project of Arda. He just refused to follow the Plan because he wanted to do things his own way...  
(he just marred the Song)  
his poor, misunderstood twin...  
(destroyer of the Lamps)  
(foe of order and logic)  
(stealer of power)  
(liar)  
(bringer of havoc and discord)  
Those strange thoughts weren't his, those were the words of other Valar, they were telling them to him so many times, full of bad emotions directed towards Melkor.  
Manwë understood them, but still... He believed that Melkor needed a second chance, that he was making bad decisions, mistakes... He wasn't evil, he couldn't be. He was just made that way, he was meant to be the power of change and extremes. He couldn't act in more ordered way, he couldn't do less than "everything" and more than "nothing".  
Manwë sighed, almost hearing Varda's voice in his mind:  
(but cannot he do something less than "everything wrong" and more than "nothing good" at least once?)  
He was making so many wrong decisions and this one was the next one. Instead of leaving the Children in peace he tried to steal their freedom from them. Manwë had hoped that he will understand his mistake when they will show him that they will stand against him to protect the Firstborn.  
He didn't.  
The Battle of Powers was horrible and Manwë felt even worse than other Valar. They were sad because they needed to destroy a big part of the land. But none of them waged a battle against their brother.  
The brother who was meant to be the strongest and most stubborn one,  
The brother who caged the wind.  
The brother who lost his path.  
The brother who still loved and cared for him.


	2. Chapter 2

The candle was replaced with a new one and then with one more (Manwë hated to sit in the darkness) before a light knock to the door came to Manwë's ears. He lifted his head and saw Melkor walking in. He closed the door behind himself and laid his gaze on the younger Ainu.   
Melkor was beautiful like fire dancing on ice, like volcano with lava flowing down snow-covered slopes. He was the mightiest of the Ainur and his beauty was untold. Only one among the Ainur was fairer than him - the Sublime Kindler of Light. Melkor was clad in the shape of a tall, pale and red-haired Firstborn. His long limbs were slender and graceful, his hair seemed to be aflame. His eyes were black like the Void. In a dark violet robe with golden buttons and lace he was looking like a king.  
(he was supposed to look that way, he was supposed to be their leader)  
"Mānawenūz," the other Ainu spoke with his charming voice.   
(the voice which he used to taint the Music)  
"Brother of mine, I came to visit you," he continued, smiling widely. His smile seemed to be innocent and honest so Manwë replied with one of his own, a faint shadow of his usual happy grin.  
"Free me, Belekôrôz," he repeated the words he was speaking like a mantra, a litany. And Melkor's reply was the same as always, like a part of their ritual.  
"No, Mānawenūz. I sealed your power with the circlet on your head and you are in my dwelling. Obey my commands and your stay will be a pleasant one."  
Only young Vana loved words as much as Melkor did. Manwë remembered a situation from the past, in the time before the Music, when Yavanna said...  
("Belekôrôz cannot say a simple 'yes' without adding at least two dozen words after it")  
Manwë almost heard her soft, yet strong voice in his mind.   
"Brother," the Elder King looked into those black eyes with his blue ones. "We both know that this is madness. You would not stand a chance against all the Valar and Maiar who will come here for me. And the surface of the world would melt again when our powers tear the matter of existence to pieces. The Firstborn... They are fragile, such a battle can destroy them..."  
Melkor stood before his sitting brother and touched the simple silver circlet - the thing which prevented him from leaving his fana and reduced his powers almost to zero.  
"I don't care. I don't care who will come and what will happen to the elves. I will destroy them all if they are stupid enough to stand against the Mighty Arising."  
He smiled at his younger brother and sat down on a nearest chair. It was a simple chair but while Manwë was observing it, it changed, ornaments appeared on the surface of it and after a minute it looked more like a throne.   
"Melkor," Manwë started again after a while. "Let me go. My friends need me."  
"I need you too. You are the one who's my twin," Melkor said, smiling. It was almost as if they were in Halls of Eru again - only this time Manwë was his brother's prisoner.  
"We can return to them together," he started, slowly. "I am sure if you say you are sorry and will not misbehave again Iluvatar will forgive you and you can be one of us again. But first you should remove the circlet from my head."  
"There's one problem: I don't regret anything," Melkor said, flames in his eyes. "I chose to be who I am now, Manwë. I am the rightful king of Arda. One day you will understand," he assured the younger Ainu.  
Manwë's eyes widened at his words. How could his brother be so blind and stubborn? He couldn't understand why Melkor decided to be this way and commit so many sins against Iluvatar's will.   
"I don't want to understand, if that means hurting others and acting against Iluvatar's will," the younger Ainu said, firmly. "You are doing wrong, Melkor. Please, stop. I don't want the Allfather to punish you. I don't want to be your opponent, I want to be at your side. If that means you being the Elder King - so be it. I don't care about my position, I care about you, the other Ainur and the Children."  
"How sweet," Melkor smiled at him with a smile so similar to a kind smile Manwë might give to his friends. "You are so naive, my brother."  
He leaned in and looked into Manwë's blue eyes.  
"There will be no returning and begging for Iluvatar's mercy. But I can promise you one of those thing you mentioned. You will be at my side, Manwe. You will stand beside me when I take over what should be mine from the very beginning."  
Manwë opened his mouth to speak but Melkor was already leaving


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The captive stays in Utumno. The one who caught him may have an idea how to convince him to change his ways. Or just wants some cuddles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Valar, it was long, but here it is, a new chapter of this fic.

The room was shadowy, but Manwë didn't need light to know what was inside his cell and where it was. There was a big bed, a few chairs, a table and a bookshelf. He had learned how to move in the shadows, but still needed at least a faint light - not to see, but to remain sane. Melkor once had tried to keep him in the darkness, but quickly he had realized Manwë would just sit and not talk or eat while kept in darkness.   
Manwë didn't know how long he was here, trapped in this room, with his power sealed. Where were the other Ainur? Were they alright? Did they manage to keep Melkor away from the Firstborn? Did they take them away, to Valinor? All those questions were dancing in his mind, everything else wasn't important. And yet there were no answers for those questions.  
Melkor was visiting his brother, but no matter what he was saying the younger one didn't want to listen. Melkor's words were sinful, twisting their meaning and misleading the one who would listen to them even for a second. The Vala knew about that and was using all the strength of his will to keep himself focused. Melkor was determined to make Manwë listen to him, follow his insane ideas, but quickly he realized Manwë's will was stronger than one could imagine it to be. There was no point in convinging or torturing him and now Manwë was but sitting in his cell, not taking any part in Melkor's plans. The Elder King was not sure what will happen to him, but he still had hope Melkor would eventually realize how insane his deeds were and return to be one of the Valar. And let him free.  
Days were passing and Utumno's prisoner was still locked in his small, shadowy jail. His only guest was Melkor and Manwë dared to hope he was coming here not only to try to make him follow him, but also to see his little brother.  
One time Manwë woke up from a nightmare and saw Melkor sitting on the edge of his bed. The older Ainu was dressed in a dark purple sleeping robe, ornamented with golden thread. His hand was stroking Manwë's hair as he was humming a silent noise - a melody which wasn't a lullaby, but managed to calm down the Vala. What he is doing here? Manwë thought, blinking in surprise.  
"Move," Melkor said quietly. As Manwë followed this order and moved on the bed closer to the other side of it. Melkor rested his fana just beside him, pulling the blanket over his long limbs. He turned to lay on his side and smiled at Manwë - a gentle smile, so different from his usual wicked grins. "Now don't worry to have more nightmares, I am here to scare them away. Rest, brother."  
Manwë moved closer, seeking not only the warmth of his fana, but also the calming presence of an another being close to him. He looked up into Melkor's fair face.  
"Why, Melkor? Why something always must be so hard, so problematic? Why cannot we be as we were earlier? Why did you change so much?" he asked, his voice a soft whisper.  
"Because we grow," Melkor replied. "We will talk about that later. Now sleep."  
And the younger Ainu fell asleep, relaxing in the embrace of his older brother, his evil twin. He didn't see Melkor bow his head and press a small kiss to the top of his head, nor did he hear his whisper.  
"Sleep well, little brother. Tomorrow we will start a new way."


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Manwe dreams about freedomm, Melkor wants to keep his brother at his side.

In his dream Varda was at his side. Her dark eyes were full of stars and her hair seemed to glow faintly as if it was reflecting the starlight. In the dream he was sitting next to her, eating berries and smiling as she was singing and making new stars above their heads. He was free in the dream, able to change in a cloud or a bird. He could taste the colors of the wind and with one movement of his hand create a tornado or lightning. 

He knew it was a dream because he knew perfectly well he was locked in a room deep under the surface of the world, unable to use his powers. He could feel the motionless air around his fana and couldn't purify it or make it move off the room so some fresh air could fill it. He was the spirit of ever-changing winds - being forced to stay in one place for so long was a horrible torture. Yet he was silent about that, not wanting to show Melkor how great pain he felt. Melkor surely didn't want to cause him so much pain...

As he woke up he realized two things - he was not alone and someone was stroking his hair. He looked up and saw Melkor. Today he was wearing a simple, dark red robe. The room was filled with light, a candlestick with four candles was placed upon the table. Melkor seemed to be peaceful and pleased to cares Manwë's hair like that.

"Good day, Manwë," he said quietly. "Did you sleep well?"

"Varda was in my dream," Manwë sat up and didn't notice the grimace on Melkor's face upon hearing the name of the lightkindler. "We were outside, watching the sky..." Manwë couldn't stop his voice from resembling the great longing he felt deep in his heart. It was so long! He wanted to take off his circlet and feel free again.

"I will take you for a small walk, Manwë," Melkor smiled as Manwë turned around to look at him with those wide, innocent, blue eyes.

"Really? Oh, Melkor! I'd love to go for a walk with you!" the Vala said, hope and joy mixed in his voice. He did his best to tame his excitement, but couldn't - it was so long since he was outside of this room!

"Yeah. Just dress properly first. We don't want my servants to see you in such a state, you're my brother and you should as fabulous as you can look." Melkor stood up and smoothed the front of his robe.

The Vala quickly stood up from his bed and went to a simple shelf where his clothes were folded in a white and blue pile of fabric. He quickly covered his naked fana and ran his fingers through his hair in a poor attempt to brush it. Melkor gave a short sound of displeasure as Manwë froze with his hand up, touching the circlet on his head.

"Come and sit here," the older Ainu gestured to the chair near him. "I'll brush your hair."

Manwë obeyed his command and Melkor started to brush his hair with a small brush which he took off one of his pockets. The lord of darkness was brushing his hair gently, making sure not to tug it. Manwë closed his eyes, glad that he will go out and that Melkor was taking care of his hair.

"It is like it was in the Halls of Iluvatar," he whispered. Melkor froze for a second and then returned to run his brush down Manwë's hair. "Do you remember? We were sitting on the edge of the domain He created for us and brushing each other's hair. It was so wonderful..."

"Yes, it was," Melkor's voice was quiet and calm as if he was thinking about the same thing. "And it will be again, Manwë. We will brush each other's hair and sit together on top of the highest mountain on Arda. I will make one for us to sit upon," he promised. Manwë didn't know Melkor was determined to use their bond and promise him everything just to make him follow him and accept him as the true Elder King of Arda, the ruler of the world and the Children.

"Yes, when you let me go and accept the punishment for all the destruction you caused," Manwë gave a nod, not seeing the spark of anger in Melkor's eyes. "You can make it with Aulë, he likes to make mountains."

"His mountais are ugly and all look the same. Mine will be really different," Melkor promised pridefully, deciding not to talk about the first part of Manwë's statement right now. The Vala just smiled, Melkor always was fast to find flaws in Aulë's works. "Alright, enough of it. Come, brother."

Manwë stood up and turned around to face Melkor. The younger Ainu was a bit taller, his hair long and golden. One needed only to look into his sky-blue eyes for a second to see his kind and gentle nature. Melkor tuened his gaze away and took Manwë's hand. He pulled him in direction of the door.

"Just remember to stay at my side and not bother working people," he warned the Vala. "And don't think about running away, with the circlet on your head I will always find you and your powers are sealed."

After this warning he opened the door, letting the air of Utumno in and the Breath of Arda out of the room.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Manwë sees Utumno the first time in his existence.

In the great halls of Utumno the footsteps of the dark Ainu were like rhythmical beat of drums. Manwë's footsteps were light and no one could hear him as he was walking beside his brother. In white robes he was easy to spot between the shadows and fires of the vast chambers. As Melkor's robes were highly ornamented Manwë's were simple and plain. But somehow one couldn't mistake him for a weak or poor being - there was an aura of silent authority around him and he was walking as if he wasn't a prisoner with his power sealed.

The Maiar, followers of Melkor, were lurking in the shadows, observing their master and his brother walk between the pools of lava and clouds of smoke. Each one of them noticed that the younger Ainu was smiling, looking around in curiousity. He seemed to really enjoy this walk, a small sense of freedom after so many days in a small cell. Manwë recognized one or two Maiar, former followers of Orome and Vana. Now they were Melkor's and everything about them was new, different and resembling their change. Gothmog was here, a great spirit of fire, now sitting in a great pool of lava. He looked at Manwë and smiled ssadly, as if he knew some great secret which would break Manwë's heart. He closed his eyes and hummed a silent note as the lava around him became hotter. Manwe wasn't sure if he was glad to see Gothmog again or displeased to see him here, following Melkor's path of wrong deeds and twisted songs. Yet he had no time to think about it, for Melkor spoke to him.

"Do you like my dwelling, Manwë?" Melkor turned his head to look at his brother. No matter how long he was closed in Utumno, he could still smell the scent of fresh air around him. Manwë was a calm prisoner, never crying or threatening him. He was just asking him to let him go in quiet words. Melkor wasn't sure he could bend his will to follow him, not Iluvatar. There was a chance he could stay at his side because of his love.

The Vala gazed into Melkor's eyes, silent for a moment, sorting his thoughts. He was still a captive, but somehow he felt as if this walk was a promise of near freedom. He didn't want to fight Melkor - with or without his power - for he was one of the closest beings to him in Arda. But Melkor's actions were confusing him and were against the Plan of Iluvatar. Manwë didn't want the Allfather to punish Melkor. He believed that his brother was confused, lost his path and was too proud to admit his mistakes. Yet he knew Iluvatar would make them fight if Melkor wouldn't listen to him. And there was but a little chance he would. Why was he so stubborn? Why did he want all the beings of Arda under his feet and the world shaped to his - and only his - liking?

"That is surely a huge castle, but the air here is still," he replied, slowly. He didn't like the place, but didn't want to hurt Melkor's feelings - after all maybe Melkor liked all those sharp rocks, lava pools, oddly shaped mineral structures and high ceilings with needles of rocks one by another, long and sharp. It seemed Melkor decorated this place to look dangerous and intimidating. One false step and you could harm or destroy your fana. "I am sorry, Melkor, but I don't feel like at home here. You should come with me to Valinor, I'll show you Ilmrin. It is a lovely place, full of beautiful things, colors and pillows on which you can sit..."

He needed only a second to imagine his home, the palace with white walls and the starry sky as its roof. There were always some birds there, the big halls were full of music and laughter of the Maiar. Manwë let this vision wander to Melkor's mind. That was his home, this fair place, not this deadly cave. Manwë realized once again how great was his desire to return home. But then he froze because Melkor started to laugh.

"So that is a deadly, ugly cave, huh?" he turned to Manwë, who just sighed. It seemed Melkor wasn't annoyed. The Vala gave his brother an apologetic gaze and Melkor shook his head. He expected Manwë to find Utumno too different to Valinor, too dark. The fortress was just like Melkor's mind, full of traps, twisted paths and ever-changing labirynths without an end.

"I am sure your dwelling is... Comfortable for you and your followers..." the younger Ainu tried to find a polite way to describe Utumno and don't hurt Melkor's feelings. It just caused Melkor to laugh more, so Manwë fell silent. Soon they came to a huge gate, two Maiar of fire standing on both sides of it. The gate was made from iron, heavy and majestic. The Maiar were like two pillars of fire, their eyes piercing the darkness. As Melkor stopped before the door the Maiar opened it for him, letting the twins inside a huge chamber.

"That's the throne room," Melkor explained as he entered. Manwë followed him closely. He didn't want to make Melkor think he was up to something - that could make Melkor keep him in his cell for months again. And to be caged in a small area was horrible to him, a free spirit of air.

The throne room was different than the other halls of Utumno. It was spacious so the ceiling was hidden in shadow while the area closer to the floor was illuminated with countless gemstones reflecting the light radiating from a pool of bright fire in center of the chamber. Columns of obsidian were supporting the ceiling above their heads while they were walking in direction of the opposite wall. There were high stairs, leading to Melkor's throne. It was made from a single piece of black crystal. 

Manwë turned around to look at the whole chamber, it was easy to see he was impressed and didn't expect to see this room look that way. He couldn't notice a spark in Melkor's eyes - the dark Ainu was quite pleased that his younger brother was impressed. It was good to remind those brats he had some taste and liked beautiful things. He just had a bit different opinion about what's beautiful.

Suddenly both of them turned to the still opened gate. A tall man was walking in their direction. He was clad in a light armour, perfectly shaped from iron. He held his helmet, shaped to resemble head of one of Yavanna's predators, in his hand. His aura was one of a spirit of creation, of earth and all what was within it. It was an aura of a craftsman, confident in his skill and intelligent.

"Ah!" Manwë gasped as he recognized the newcomer. His fana was handsome, his dark brown hair falling on his shoulders and back, his golden eyes serious and full of passion. The Maia smiled lightly as he looked into Manwë's eyes and knelt before Melkor on one knee.

"Master," he spoke. "I and my men are ready to leave."

Manwë was looking at him as Melkor approached him and laid his hand on his beautiful hair. The Vala couldn't do anything else than stare at the Maia. He knew Melkor could easily read all his emotions in his face right now. Manwë's memories returned as he was looking at this smiling Maia, kneeling before Melkor. That was the one, who had betrayed them all. That was the one, who had caused all of this - he himself had put on Manwë's head the seal of Melkor when Manwë had been busy weaving a spell. He had sneaked behind his back - the next thing Manwë could remember was waking up in Utumno, in Melkor's power. Those golden eyes belonged to a traitor and that pained Manwë, for he had thought they were friends.

"Leave with my blessing..." Melkor replied. "...Mairon."


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Manwë left his cell and found a traitor. A Maia, who loves his new master more than anything in the whole world. And for his master he is ready to commit any sin.

"Leave with my blessing..." Melkor replied. "...Mairon."

And Mairon rose, the smirk never leaving his lips as he was looking at Manwë. The Vala felt betrayed, lost and confused at the same time. He wanted to ask Mairon why had he decided to betray them like that.

He turned his gaze to Melkor. His brother was an Ainu, who had lost his path long ago. Many had followed him, but Manwë didn't expect someone to turn to him now, after so many ages.

"Mairon..." he whispered. His voice was like a silent moan of the wind blowing through wastelands destroyed by the great Battle of Powers. The Maia ignored him and turned to Melkor.

"Master, I prepared the tokens. Would you put your seals on them?" he asked and offered to the dark Ainu a small bag. Melkor took it and opened. He took off the bag a small diamond on a silver chain. For a second he was looking at it, humming quietly. Manwë gasped when he realized what it was. That was the heavenly song of Varda, but twisted and dark. 

"Why? Melkor, why did you sing that?" he asked and Melkor looked at him. 

"This," he lifted the diamond up. "This is a seal for the one who rejected me. Iluvatar blessed me so I have little bits of abilities of you all. So I use them to form a personal seal, just like yours. You cannot feel the magic when it smells just like you, right?"

There was a small smile on his lips when he was talking.

"But..." Manwë was unable to understand. "Why? Why are you doing that?"

"To make you all listen to me, of course," Melkor replied. "I am sure you will follow me just like Mairon one day, when you start see the world through my eyes. This way I don't need to waste power to fight you, you stubborn Ainur."

"Mairon, did he do that to you?" Manwë turned to face the Maia. One glance in his golden eyes was enough to know the answer, but Mairon replied.

"No. I joined him because I wanted to do that, Manwë," he stated. Melkor laid his hand on Mairon's shoulder.

"In fact it is him, who suggested the seals and created them," he added with a grin. "See, Manwë, there is no way you can follow this silly Plan of Iluvatar if you cannot use your power. And you cannot opose me - the One Who Rises In Might."

"Melkor, that's madness. You cannot force Mai-"

"He doesn't force me, Manwë. Understand it, he is the master of my spirit and I love to serve him," Mairon didn't let him finish his sentence. Manwë took a step back, unable to speak for a second. He couldn't understand why Mairon would do such a sin - to not only betray the Valar, but to work against the will of Iluvatar? How could he be so blind? That Plan was important, was to ensure the growth of the Children, the chance for the Second Music and healing of Arda! The Elder King took a deep breath, calming himself down. He needed to show them they were wrong, that this path was a horrible choice. With no Valar being Guardians of Arda Iluvatar would surely punish Melkor himself and wouldn't show him mercy for all his sins. He must to talk some sense into Melkor's stubborn head - for sake of Arda. For his own sake.

"That is still crazy," he said, looking at the two other Ainur in the room. He was serious, looking firmly at them - just like an older brother could look at a stubborn and reckless younger siblings. He was responsible for them, as the Elder King, he needed to stay strong and not let them continue that. "Stop that, both of you. You mustn't follow rhe path of destruction and darkness!"

"But we want to," Melkor chuckled, as if amused by the look on Manwë's face. The Maia took off his bag a next token, a ruby. Melkor took it and sang the song of the Craftsman, strong and slow, deep and steady, just like Aulë. Manwë covered his ears and cried. 

"Stop it! That is against the Plan!" his voice was like a cry of an eagle.

"I don't care about it anymore, Manwë," Melkor at looked his brother and handed the ruby to Mairon. "I said I will rule Arda and I will. I will reshape it to my liking." Mairon put the gem in the bag.

And then that happened.

Manwë found himself acting without thinking. In one second he jumped forward, caught the bag and after two steps away from the other Ainur he threw it in the pool of lava near to them all. Something exploded under the surface of lava, but Manwë had no time to notice that.

With a low growl Mairon jumped at the Vala, who dared to destroy his work. He expected to hit the Vala and teach him a lesson, but his fist found no flesh. Manwë jumped to the side and kicked him, causing him to roll away. Mairon stood up and looked at Manwë. The blonde Ainu was looking at him with stern, sad eyes. 

As the Maia jumped at his brother Melkor gave a silent noise and turned around so he couldn't see them. Manwë's behavior was stupid - he couldn't stop them from making new gems. But it seemed he needed to be taught a lesson - and Mairon was the right one to do that. Melkor wouldn't hit his brother, but he knew that this Maia could do that and wouldn't be too violent. This way he will learn we are not joking, he thought, and we will hurt him if he tries to stand in our way. In my way. The sounds of heavy breathing, footsteps, punches and kicks reaching a solid fana were filling the spacce behind his back. Mairon was a strong Maia and Manwë had his powers sealed away. Melkor waited for a moment and then turned around to face them and order Mairon to stop.

"Mai- Oh!"

Manwë was sitting on Mairon's chest, pressing his hands to the floor with his knees and slapping his face as if to wake him up. Mairon tried to push him off, but failed. Melkor bit his lips and waved his head. The seal around Manwë's head started to glow.

As the seal started to shine Manwë felt an invisible force around him. It prevented his body from moving and he couldn't breathe for a long moment. Mairon noticed the surprise and pain in his eyes and pushed him away. Manwë fell on the floor, motinless. The Maia stood up and kicked his side, causing him to breathe at last, a sharp cry of pain leaving Manwë's mouth.

"Stop it!" Melkor approached them immediately. "That's enough. Mairon, prepare new tokens immediately and return to me."

"Aye, my liege," the Maia just peeked at the dark Ainu and practically ran away.

"And call Gothmog here!" Melkor cried after him. Then he knelt beside Manwë and stroked his cheek, brushing away his golden hair. "When did you learn how to fight? Nevermind, now it is not important. Oh, Manwë, I thought you know how to behave."

A huge Maia of fire, with his sad eyes full of curiousity, entered the throne room. Melkor stood up and took a step back.

"My brother, you irked me. Why did you do that?" he made a gesture, lightening the grip of the seal on him a little, letting his speak.

"You musn't do that! I will fight if I must to, but I will do everything to stop you!" Manwë's voice was full of emotions. "Release me and admit your mistakes, so Iluvatar will forgive you and we can guard Arda together!"

Melkor gestured to the balrog to come closer and ignored Manwë's cries.

"Take the prisoner to his room. I am tired of his silly words. It seems he thinks there is a possibility for me to return to be Iluvatar's puppet."

Gothmog picked up Manwë's body.

"One cannot enter again the same river of lava," he said with a sigh.

"Melkor..." Manwë started again, lookig at his brother as he reached up and touched his cheek again. "Please, stop... Before it's too late..."

"Stop daydreaming, Manwë," he whispered softly, his eyes glowing with emotions Manwë couldn't name. "My twin, please. Stay at my side. Accept the reality and the new order of Arda. I need you at my side. I know deep in your heart you want to join me, so stop pretending. Think about us, together again. I'll come to visit you later," Then he looked at the balrog. "Take him away."

Gothmog sighed heavily and carried Manwë away, back to his tiny cell, where nothing was changing, where Manwë was alone with his thoughts, fears and desires. And where he could cry.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Manwë has an unexpected quest.

There were no more tears, he couldn't cry any longer. Pain and anger faded and fear and sorrow came, clouded his mind. He was again in his room, his jail, alone and surrounded by the still air and stone walls. Yet now he was not paying attention to that, not thinking about his future and his situation.

He was worried, more than ever. Where was Mairon? Was he between the faithful Ainur, trying to seal powers of his kinsmen? Many thoughts were spinning in his head as he was sitting on his bed, wrapping his arms around his legs, resting his forehead on his knees. Why was Melkor doing that? Why did he want to enslave the Children so badly? Couldn't he realize his path was one leading to destruction and sorrow? 

"Oh, Melkor..." he whispered. "I don't want to be your opponent, I don't want to fight you. I don't want to be the one to punish you... Oh, brother..."

His voice was like a faint gust of wind, dry and weak, full of sadness, confusion and other emotions tangled in a bundle in his mind. Manwë wasn't used to stay in a solid shape for so long (he wasn't sure how long he was trapped underground, but it seemed to be really long) and this was only adding to his feeling of being trapped forever. How long was it since the meeting in the throne room of Utumno? He was praying to Iluvatar, trying to reach the Creator and beg him to influence Melkor and his followers. He just wanted to wake up and realize it all was but a horrible nightmare. Wondering who would be the victim of the traitorous Maia caused an ache in his chest.

"It seems you are really depressed," a voice spoke suddenly. Manwë looked up as he felt a gust of fresher air coming from direction of the door. It wasn't Melkor, but someone else. Bright blue eyes widened in shock as he saw the shape of the being who entered the room. Three pairs of huge wings stirred the air as she turned around to close the door behind her. Her hair, in contrast to her feathery dark blue wings and robes of pure white, were pitch black. As she gazed upon him Manwë found himself lost in disbelief - her fair dark blue eyes were calm like starry space high above the surface of Arda.

The light of Ea stood before him.

"V-Varda...?" he uttered, his voice low and harsh from hours of crying. Her smile grew wide as she tilted her head. He looked at her wavy hair fall like waterfall from behind her shoulder as she turned her head to look around.

"He keeps you in a nice cell," the voice admitted. The tembre of the voice and the darkness of her hair gave her away.

"You aren't her!" The Vala said, relief in his voice. For a short second he thought she was captured just like him. Now it seemed someone took the shape of his beloved Kindler to torment him more. Yet they couldn't imitate the voicce of Fanuilos nor the holy radiance of her hair. Manwë knew it'd turn dark only when she was in despair or tired beyond measurements. "Who are you? Why did you try to fool me?"

"No, I didn't try to fool you. You did it yourself, because you wanted to see Varda in chains, with her power sealed just like yours," the being replied and smiled sweetly. "You wish your beloved one to join you, so you could look at her and pity her, to forget how miserable you are without your power. Ai, how great is your desire to look down at others and give them your pity! How wicked is Sulimo, claiming to love someone and desiring them on their knees."

The Vala's mouth opened, but no sound came out of his throat. Yes, he felt lonely and would love to have Elentari at his side, but not as a prisoner of Melkor! Just thinking about Varda trapped in a similar cell was painful to him. 

"That's... That's not true!" he managed to utter. "You are mistaken. I don't want her here, being captured... I don;t want her kept here..."

"Ha! So you don't want your beloved wife around you? Oh, you cold, cold Vala!" the being chuckled. "I cannot wait to see her face when she learns about it!"

"No! You didn't understand!" Manwë waved his hands and shook his head, sitting straight. "I do want her close to me, but not a prisoner like me!"

They were talking for some time longer, the being twisting every one of his words, Manwë desperately trying to undo that. He felt even weaker and more pitiful, feeling as if a grey mist of despair and sorrow was choking him, clouding his mind. 

"You really should make up your mind," the being shook her head after some time. "You want her at your side or not? Or maybe I can be your companion in her stead? I can assure you I am much more fun than she is." Manwë was observing with wide eyes as she started to walk in his direction, opening her arms. Her smile was broad and merciless, cold and wicked.

"No! Stay away!" the Vala jumped back, trying to make the distance between her and himself as wide as possible. Looking at the face so familiar and yet so strange Manwë felt tears running down his cheeks, tears of fear and relief. She was not Varda and that at the same made him happy and frightened. To know that this being was just pretending to be his beloved one was a relief - he couldn't bear the thought of Elbereth becoming a wicked, twisted Ainu. Yet he still didn't know if she was free or captured. Maybe a being just ike this one was talking to her right now, tormenting her with his face and lies? And he couldn't do anything to help her or to help himself. 

That was hopeless. He was weak and had no chance of doing anything good. He was chained and kept away from his beloved friends for too long. His brother and his followers were holding him imprisoned and were about to catch other Valar - he couldn't even warn them. That was wrong, so wrong! Without any Ainu guarding the world Iluvatar would not have a choice than to step in and punish all of them - Melkor for being a sinner and Manwë for not preventing the horrible deeds of his brother. Manwë couldn't save, couldn't protect those he loved dearly.

With those thoughts the Ainu felt his legs weaken and he collapsed on the floor, his head lowering blonde hair veiling his face. He could hear the light footsteps of the being pretending to be Varda, but he didn't care if this spirit was close to him or not. Was he a failure? Was it possible for Iluvatar to make a mistake and choose a wrong person to rule Ea in his stead? Why couldn't he convince Melkor and others to become the Ainur they were supposed to be, born to be? Melkor didn't understand how great was his sin. He was too stubborn to realize how childish was his behavior.

"Look at him, so broken by mere words," hummed the being as she stopped just before him. She lifted her hand to touch his blonde hair, but stopped.

"Leave him for now," spoke the voice Manwë knew so well. The Vala raised his head just to see his brother. Melkor, smiling widely. "You can come to visit him tomorrow."

"Yes, master," the being grinned at Manwë. "See you soon, faithful Sulimo."


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mairon appears again and he's not alone.

anwë was outside of his cell, walking down a corridor. Utumno was oddly quiet and fires were burning low here and there. Beside him was walking the Maia who had been visiting him from time to time. Now she was in shape of Aulë - broad shoulders and honest eyes filled with intelligence and creativity. Yet those brown eyes, lookign at the Vala, were twinking with malice and there was no warmth in them. Manwë felt more lonely than ever, looking at the shape of one of his dear friends. Sometimes it was hard to remember it wasn't Aulë.

The Vala was a mere shadow of his former self. The air around him was still and his hair and feathes lost their glow. Bright blue eyes were dim, without a spark of joy and kindness. He was walking slowly, his footsteps no longer light. The Maia beside him was smiling while looking at him, triumph in her eyes, but he didn't care. He wasn't sure she was a female, he was thinking about her as a female, because she had been in shape of a female during their first meeting. He was pretty sure she'd tell him who she was now, but he didn't care either.

That was Iluvatar's punishment for being a poor steward. He had failed and now he was just being punished for this. Melkor had chained him and Iluvatar did nothing to stop him - a clear sign of his disgrace. Manwë had no more tears to cry and didn't try to speak to Melkor. His brother wouldn't listen anyway.

They arrived at a big chamber - all Melkor's rooms were big. Only cells were small. Manwë looked around to see tapestries covering the walls. He turned to look at the Maia, but she wasn't facing him. She was looking at Mairon. The former Maia of Aulë was staring at them, holding someone's hand. Manwë focused at the petite person beside him.

A woman clad in grey, almost white robe, her hair in two long braids, a seal upon her forehead. Her eyes were full of life and awake - a rare sight. She freed her hand from Mairon's grip and ran in direction of the Vala. Mairon didn't notice that, looking at Manwë's companion as if shocked he was there. Probably the Maia fooled him as well - at least for now.

"Estë..." he breathed. Her face was pale and tired, but so dear to him in this moment. She was the only one here who loved him and didn't want to hurt him, just to help him. He took a step forward. She was like a vision of his old life. He barely could remember the sound of his laughter, the wind dancing in branches of trees, the light of the stars above his head. She was bringing all those faint memories, her grey eyes full of... Pity? Yes, she felt pity while looking at him and he didn't blame her. He was a mere shadow, an empty shell, his wings cut off. He couldn't help her or warn the others, so she was a captive just like him.

Estë reached out to Manwë and caught his hands. This one touch of hands, so brief and gentle, healed Manwë sould and filled him with new hope. He knew they were both captured, powerless, but he was himself again. The mist of depression and indifference was lifted from his mind and he could see clearly again. He smiled at her and at the same moment Aulë and Mairon dragged them away from each other.

"See what you did, stupid Maia!" cried Aulë at Mairon. "I was working on making him weak for days and now he's healed again! How is tha possible with her sealed?!"

Mairon hissed at the other.

"Shut up, moron, you shouldn't bring him here! What, did you want to show everyone how great you are and how easily you drained him from his hope? Those seals are perfect! It's your fault, you charm wasn't strong enough!"

Manwë knew it wasn't Esteë's power what had healed him. It was her kindness, her sympathy and her love - that was only one possible explanation. Her power was sealed. Suddenly he felt a cold hand grab his wrist and he looked to his side to see Melkor. His brother glanced at his face.

"The spell is broken, indeed," he said. Aulë bowed his head.

"Master, I can cast an another one, I can make him..." he started and Manwë renembered it wasn't really Aulë. He forgot about it again.

"Enough, He will not be fooled again by your illusions."

"Brother, why did you let her do that?" Manwë asked. "I felt so bad, so depressed, so hopeless. It was awful. Please, forbid her to do such things to others."

"Why did he do that? Because he's evil. He's twisted and has no love in his heart," stated Estë, her voice loud and clear. As everyone looked at her she rested her fists on her hips. For the first time in his existence Manwë could hear hate and anger in her, usually serene, voice. "He's a disgrace and I don't understand why you still call him your brother, Manwë."

"Oh, Estë..." started Manwë, but Melkors laughter made him fall silent. His older brother threw his head back and was laughing for a long minute.

"See? Even always sleeping Estë hates me, Manwë, just because I am different," he said.

"Lies!" she cried. Manwë heard her cry for the first time ever. "You are a sinner, a murderer and bringer of destruction! You break everything you touch, you bring illness to the land and to those around you! You captured the wind and the light!"

Melkor chuckled darkly as he saw Manwë look at him with wide eyes filled with disbelief and fear.

"And now I caught the Healer," he waved his hand. "Mairon, take her to her chamber."

"Aye, master," the Maia took Estë hand and pulled her off the room. He was quiet, probably trying to solve the mystery of Manwë's return to health. Melkor pulled Manwë's hand.

"Come, it's time I show you something interesting. And you," he glanced at the Maia still clad in Aulës shape. "Find a different shape and victim. I don't need you here."

After those words he dragged Manwë out of the room and down a corridor.

"Melkor..." Manwë licked his lips. "Is that true? You... You caught three of us?" he couldn't bring himself to say "you caught Varda". Melkor gave him one of his faint smiles.

"Oh, you shall see," he said. "It is good you broke the charm around you, it will be more fun that way." After those words he pushed some door open and pulled Manwë inside a shadowy room unfamilar to him.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When the wind meets the light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is related to my other fic - Captured light. Go and check it if you want to.

The room was shadowy, the only source of light were a few candles in candlesticks on a table and a nightstand. A huge bed was in the center of the chamber. Long curtains were obscuring the person laying on the bed - but Manwë could hear them breathe slowly, as if in deep sleep. Melkor went to a richly ornamented chair and sat there, crossing his arms in front of his chest and looking at him. A small smile was curling upwards the corners of his mouth.

"You can do anything you want to here," he said quietly. Manwë looked at the bed again. The curtains were made from red silk, golden snakes were embroidered on it. He took a step forward.

"Brother..." he started. Could it be...? Was it...? Melkor chuckled, no joy in this sound..

"Just look at her and see that you all will end that way," he said, waving his hand. The Vala felt his heart break - his brother didn't see how a great fool he was. For Manwë the fact that Melkor held him as a captive was not as horrible sin as capturing other Ainur. And that meant Manwë couldn't protect him. 

He turned his head in direction of the bed. It could be an illusion, like with the Maia who had tormented him earlier. He tried to clung to this thought, it brough him some hope. He was torn between his love to his brother and his duties and friends. 

"Plese, do not try this trick with shapeshifting Maiar again, Melkor. I can recognize them," he said to his older brother. All bad deeds of Melkor towards him he could chose to ignore, but tormenting others... He prayed to Iluvatar to learn that Melkor was indeed trying to fool him.

"See for yourself," Melkor smiled.

The Vala approached the bed slowly, but without hesitation. He made his choice to look at the imposter and reveal Melkor's attempt to play with his mind for the second time. Manwë reached his hand out and brushed aside the curtain, gazing upon the figure resting on the bed.

It was a woman clad in dark blue robe, silver stars embroidered on the hem of her dress. Manwë sat on the edge of the bed without realizing this motion. He didn't notice that Melkor lifted his head, looking at his face like a predator could look at its prey. Bright blue eyes were scanning the sleeping woman's face, trying to find a sign it was an imposter.

She had upon her forehead the seal he knew so well, her hair dark grey, but with the faint glow - a sign of her weak state. Her face was flawless. As he reached for her hand - the gesture they both knew so well - he felt her fingers were warm. 

"Varda," he whispered, his voice faint and full of tangled emotions. It was her, his blovd one, his soulmate from time before time. She was his hope and inspiration, his strength in times of self-doubt, sorrow and confusion. She was the kindler of light, able to chase away darkness. Dark blue eyes opened slowly and focused on him. He could read in those starry eyes how confused and tired she was.

"Manwë," she spoke and licked her dry lips. Her voice was a mere ecko of her song. His heart broke at the sound of his name in her mouth and the joy from seeing her after so long faded. She was a captive, just like him, powerless and weak. He could feel her physical strength was almost gone, her hand in his grip was motionless. Sadness and guilt brought tears to his eyes. He didn't wipe them off his cheeks, just blinked so he could still see her.

"I suppose you believe me now. I have three of you and will have all of you soon," Melkor spoke, still sitting on a chair near the door. Manwë turned to look at him and Varda just glanced at him, love disappearing from her face, replaced by pure hate. "Darling, you look even prettier when you're angry and weak."

"Melkor..." she started, but Manwë was faster.

"Brother, please, let her go," he pleaded. "I will stay willingly beside you, just let her go."

"That's great!" Melkor chuckled. "You really think you are in a position to give me requests like this? I have you both and I will keep you. Varda is a sign, her broken spirit at my side will make the rest lose hope. And you will show them there is no point in fighting the mightiest of the Ainur. I will rule over Arda and enslave the Children. I will do what I please, not what he wants."

Manwë felt Varda's hand tremble and covered it with his fingers. One glance at her face told him she was not shaking from fear, but rage. 

"I will put you in the heart of a pulsar," she whispered, looking at Melkor's smile. "I will tear you to little bits... I will purify Arda. I wil..."

"You will do whatever I order you to do," Melkor replied, his voice cold. He was focused on the Valie for a long while before turning to his brother. "And you will stay at my side, brother. If you do something to displeaase me I will punish her. Remember this, Manwë."

"Do everything against him," Varda said to Manwë immediately, determination in her voice. "Do everything in your power to go against his will. I do not mind pain if it's for a good thing. You are the Elder King and Iluvatar's steward..."

"It's enough," Melkor waved his hand and the gem above her brow twinkled. Her eyelids closed as she fell asleep again. Manwë still held her hand as he turned to look at Melkor.

"Brother..." he started. He could see Melkor was angry and unhappy. Probably Varda mentioning Iluvatar and asking Manwë to oppose him made him annoyed.

"Silence," Melkor stood up. Everyone but Manwë would be afraud of him, but Manwë wasn't. It was his brother and he still loved him. "Don't waste my time and stop begging for her freedom. She is useful to me. And when she is no longer useful I will take her power for myself. Maybe then I'll let her go and see my vision of Arda."

"That would break her heart," Manwë whispered, shocked by his words. How could one desire more power? How could one desire to take it from someone else? Melkor stood beside the bed and looked down at the sleeping Ainu.

"Why do you think I don't want to do this?" he asked. "I hate her, I want her broken and begging me for death. I want to twist her and corrupt her. I want her to lose everything she is." His eyes were full of pure hate, determination and rage. Manwë knew the reason for that - she had rejected him, she was his sworn enemy. Manwë was his brother and had no desire to oppose him actively, but Varda was different, she wanted to fight him. Maybe they were too similar to get along... Manwë squuezed Varda's hand and laid it on the cover before he stood up. Melkor looked at him. "That includes you. I want her to see you at my side, Manwë. You are my twin, I need you," his voice for a moment was soft. "Don't turn your back on me, Manwë. Join me and I will let you keep her as long as she's under my control."

Those words, the tone of his voice, made Manwë's eyes fill with tears again, but he wiped them in silence.

"See? I give you a choice. You can willingly join me and keep Varda or you can remain my prisoner and I will keep her," he smiled. This smile was just a facade, he tried to hide beind it all his hate. Manwë felt as if Melkor wanted to make him forget all those bad things he had told him just a moment ago. The rage and hate almost disappeared under this smile.

"I cannot join you, Melkor," he shook his head."You make a great mistake, commit a terrible sin. Please, leave this path. I don't want to lose you... Or anyone else," he glanced at the sleeping Ainu. "You must stop immediately, Melkor. It isn't too late! You must let all your prosoners go! You have no right..."

"Shut up!" Melkor almost roared, his presence filling the room, his darkness almost choking the younger brother. "You are in no position to order me!" he waved his hand between them and Manwë gasped as a sudden pain took over his whole being. He fell on the bed as he lost his consciousness.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laughrer echoes through the dark halls of Utumno

Manwë woke up in the room he knew all too well - he was back in his prison. He blinked a few times to focus and gave out a little sigh as he remembered everything.

Fair eyes of Elentari filled with anger.

Melkor's face when he shouted at him.

The sudden pain and darkness enveloping him completely.

He heard a noise and turned his head to look to his side. He gazed straight into Melkor's bright eyes. Pale face of his brother was just inches away from his own. Melkor was beside him, his fana clad in robes of white and red. 

"You're awake," he said with relief clear in his voice. "I'm so glad."

"Melkor," Manwë whispered. Could it be his meeting with Varda was but a bad dream? He felt deep inside that it was real - Melkor had caught three of them, weakening them greatly. The faithful Ainur lost their leader, inspiration and healer. He closed his eyes as the feeling of failure and despair once again clouded his mind. This time it was born of his own mind, not casted upon him. And it quickly passed as Manwë opened his eyes again. He had to try again - he had to try as many times as he had to fulfil his duties.

"I was so worried about you," Melkor said just as he saw the spark he knew so well appear in his blue eyes. Manwë opened his mouth and closed it before he had a chance to speak. Melkor knew well what Manwë wanted to tell him - about sins, atoning, Iluvatar's grace and stuff like this. He was tired of listening to this rubbish. "I want to show you something."

Manwë's face turned pale. Had he caught someone again? Whom? Melkor smiled in his mind, glad to see this expression. He would like to make Manwë worry for some time longer, but he knew his younger brother would surely give him a lecture about love and ask him to free the captives until he'd be sick of it.

"I want to show you one f my experiments," he said, his voice calming. Manwë relaxed and gave a small nod. 

They both stood from the bed and Manwë looked at his brother, feeling a bit guilty he had assumed he did something bad again. He was curious what the experiment could be - maybe he could use it to make Melkor realize that he was off his path? He took Melkor's hand before they left the room. It was such a simple sign of affection and trust - he wanted Melkor to realize he was not feeling angry at him for keeping him here against his will. Manwë felt sad and worried, but not angry - how could he be angry at his brother? Yet he knew deep inside that others would be annoyed by his misbehavior.

He looked at his brother as he was leading him down a corridor. Something about him was different - the white robe was resembling this change. Was it possible he realized how wrong he had been? Maybe seeing Varda made him realize this? Oh, how much he begged Iluvatar for his grace and forgiveness for his brother! He knew there was good in him, he was able to do right things, his potential was huge. Maybe Manwë's faith caused this change? It seemed to be a little one - Melkor was holding his hand gently and was smiling widely every time he was looking at him.

"So what is this experiment you want to show me?" he asked, wanting to talk more to him, to learn more about his activities in Utunno. As a prisoner he had no knowledge about the stronghold, beings living in Utumno and their duties.

"You'll see soon," Melkor replies with a grin. "I don't want to spoil the surprise."

So they were walking in silence for some time, until Melkor stopped before a closed door. He spoke a word and the door opened. The two Ainur entered a great chamber. It was different from chanbers of Utumno - in a way it looked just like a random cave, Red flames of torches were casting shadows on the rough walls.

Manwë felt Melkor pulling him farther inside, so he followed him. His big, innocent eyes were wide, looking at the shadows and shapes hidden in the dim light and smoke. His feet were moving, but the Vala felt like he was no longer able to control his fana, he was just letting Melkor drag him to the center of the cave.

Hideous beings were looking at them, silence filling the whole chamber. Manwë was unable to gaze for long in those eyes - he was too afraid of emotions and desires clear in their gaze. Melkor was walking in a steady, rather slow pace, so a moment passed before they stopped in a spot in the center of the cave. The huge, twisted and bulky figures around them moved closer, encircling them. Manwë felt as if something was choking him. He needed a moment to recognize what it was - the intense feeling of wrong. Those beings were made... Twisted by Melkor's hand. They were s mockery of Yavanna's creations. They were full of bloodlust, stubborn and...

"See? I created life, just like Aulë," Melkor spoke, gesturing in direction of the nearest beast - a huge, grey male with pale eyes and long, muscular arms reaching to his knees. Manwë took a deep breath - the air was even worse than in his cell - and looked at his brother. "Well, maybe I took something already existing and reshaped it, but I did it to such an extent you can say that I created it," Melkor added, turning to Manwë. "I see you're impressed, brother."

"Melkor..." he started and licked his lips. How could he do this? How could he reshape beings of flesh like this, surely against their will. Manwë couldn't imagine any being wanting to look like those encircling him.

"And now I want you to bless them like you blessed Aulë's creations. So Iluvatar can give them a spark of his precious Flame and make them his children," Melkor continued. "I am sure with your blessing they can walk in light of the Trees. For now they turn into stone every time a ray of light of Laurelin touches them," he made a grimace. "I tried to send them to Valinor... You know, to show you all how big and strong my minions are, but they couldn't cross the barrier of the light."

Manwë was staring at his brother for a long moment before answeing.

"Who.. Who they were before...? Can you turn them back? Please?" he pleaded, pity arising in his heart. Those beings were wrong, were... Tainted with darkness. They were a mistake.

"No," Melkor shook his head. "What's done is done. And I wouldn't it even if i could. I need an army, Manwë, a loyal, strong army. Now bless them, brother. Give them the blessing of Iluvatar's favourite Ainu."

Manwë knew it would be wrong. It would be like disrespecting the gift Iluvatar had given to Aulë's children. Nothng so twisted and eager to kill should be blessed. Manwë knew there were predators, bound to kill their prey to survive, that the Children would eat flesh of Yavanna's creations. But in eyes of the beings around him he could read that they wanted to kill for a different reason. To pass their pain to others, to feel better, to please themselves. How a being could be so wrong?

"So?" Melko asked. He knew Manwë's blessing would hold no power, since his strength was sealed. But the mere act of accepting Melkor's order, of surrounding to his will would be enough. He wanted to make Manwë realize there was no use to oppose him, to try to stop him. He wanted to reshape Manwë to becoe a brother he should be - obedient and loyal, quiet and weak. He knew it depended from how he'd react to his experimental soldiers. Would he say yes or no?

Manwë wasn't even shure his blessing could grant those beings the right to walk in the pure, holy light of the Trees, sacred creations of Yavanna. He looked around, at the monsters around him, and took a deep breathe.

"I..."

The floor under their feet shook, trembled fiercely so suddenly Manwë lost his balance and fell to his knees. A few loose rocks fell from the walls and the ceiling of the cave, crashing to pieces or hurting the monsters. 

"What...?" Melkor stood on his feet, but lost his majestic look. He was surprised... Worried?

The light of the torches grew brighter, paler. In matter of seconds it became pure white and piercing eyes of those who were looking that way. The monsters fled, hiding in shadows as the whole cave shook the next time.

Manwë lifted his head. He knew this light, so did Melkor. He could see in the bright radiance fear in Melkor's eyes.

Varda was free. And angry.

For a second they both were looking at each other - the dark Ainu clad in white and the other, kneeling beside him, with a seal upon his forehead. Manwë knew that he should immediately find Elentari and try to calm her down. Her rage was like a blazing heart of a supernova. And destructive like a black hole. The Vala stood up, but had no chance to walk, Melkor's hand caught his wrist.

"Stay with me!" he cried, fear in his voice. "I want you to stay with me, brother!"

He dragged Manwë off the cave and started to lead him down a corridor. They passes a few turns, moving as fast as they could when everything was shaking from explosions in some distance behind them. Manwë's mind was spinning. Were those his friends? Did they find Utuno and freed Varda? Or was it Iluvatar, wishing to punish his brother? Manwë wasn't sure if he was relieved that they left the cave or not. Now his brother was in danger... More, the whole continent was in danger. Why did no one try to calm down the Starkindler? Was she looking for them?

Then Melkor froze and Manwë started to listen to the sound the gust of fresh wind brought to their ears.

A sound of laughter. Some man was laughing and he was in the same corridor, walking in their direction. Melkor turned around, but as he did so he saw two figures walking in their direction. They were far, on the other end of the corridor, basket in white light, but both Manwë and Melkor could recognize them. The dark Ainu stepped to his side, just to stand behind Manwë. The person laughing couldn't be as bad as Varda and Estë.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fresh air.

Melkor was clinging to his arm, trying to hide behind his brother. Manwë couldn't blame him for his frar - Varda was visibly really angry. 

"Order her to stop!" he shireked. "Order her to go away!"

"Melkor, ordering Varda is not the best idea," Manwë felt pity for his brother, he was so scared of his wife. "I warned you - holding us againt our will was unwise." He could just hope there was a way to calm Varda's rage before she could harm Melkor. The laughter was still audiable, echoing in the corridors and halls of Utumno. Luckily the complex of dungeons and caves was not longer shaking.

Melkor groaned. Sulimo was waiting for Varda and Estë approach them - it seemed Melkor had no idea where to run or hide now. Manwë felt really sorry for him - enough to forget about his experiments and all suffering he had caused him. Yet he was afraid the rest wouldn't be so forgiving. Maybe Melkor remained at his side hoping he could help him, shield him from the warath of the Valar?

Someone tapped Manwë's shoulder and he turned around to look at a tall man, beads woven in his blonde beard, his muscular body towering above him. The man was smiling with a wide smile. The next moment Melkor looked at the man as well - and groaned.

After a moment of looking at the twins the man hit Manwë's brother in the face. Melkor cried and moved away as if afraid a next blow would come. And it came - but this time the man aimed at Manwë's face. The Vala gave out a noise of surprise at such a behavior amd mimicked Melkor's gesture of grabbing his face in pain.

"That's for letting him hold you here for so long," the man explained his action.

"Tulkas, you hit Manwë one more time and I will show you what "starstruck" means!" Varda and Estë stopped just a few steps away from them. Both were quite surprised by Tulkas' behavior, startled enough to forget about Melkor for a short moment. The dark Ainu started to slowly move back, hoping no one would notice while talking to his brother.

"Sorry," he chuckled and reached for Melkor to catch him by his arm before he had a chance to sneak away. "I couldn't resist."

"Let go of me, you brute!" cried Melkor, looking at them all, his eyes wide. Manwë gave Tulkas a pleading look, and the other Ainu fixed his grip to hold Melkor less painfully. Yet he was now a captive, Manwë could see that it was too late to save Melkor from this. He had commited a great sin and now it was time to punish him. He knew this day would come, but he desperately wanted to forget about it. Instead of watching Tulkas and Melkor he turned to face Varda and Estë.

The Healer raised her hand and sang a note, brushing her fingertips against Manwë's seal. With a quiet noise it cracked and fell from his head. A gust of fresh wind went through the corridor, pulling at their robes. 

"How did you do this?" Melkor asked, looking at Estë in sheer surprise.

"You caught Manwë and then Varda," she replied. "And when your servant sealed her power she was not alone. None of us was alone outside of Valinor after Manwë's disappearance."

"So I went with Nessa to let your servant catch me," Varda added and took Manwë's hand. "I could just wait for others to bring you back to me. I had to join you and help you be free agaim."

Manwë smiled at her softly, but Estë was speaking still. "Nessa saw your servant apporaching Varda and putting a seal on her power. So Aulë created a device to shield one's power from being sealed. When your servant found me alone and put a seal on me it didn't work. I came here to contact Varda and Manwë and free them... And since I had my power I could contact and lead others to this pit."

Melkor was standing in silence. Manwë felt pity for him, his plan failed. It was a bad choice, a great mistake. He walked closer to him, wishing to comfort him, but Melkor took a step back - just to have his shoulder squeezed by Tulkas.

Manwë could feel the difference, he had his power back. Yet he couldn't be happy - not when his brother was looking at them all with fear in his eyes. Not while his pale lips were trembling like this. Yet still a part of him felt joy, the taste of freedom and gladness of seeing his friends again - he just couldn't connect to those feelings right now. He had to went out, feel the wind swirl around him, to realize more deeply he was no longer a hopeless prisoner.

"Estë!" Irmo appeared beside his wife. Manwë recognized his smile - it was one of relief. How much worried he had been for this whole time? Manwë could see how brave his friends were... How cunning and selfless... And yet he couldn't be entirely happy because all they wanted was to catch his brother and undo his doing.

He knew Melkor's deeds were wrong, but seeing him so miserable and defeated was painful.

"Others want you to join them," Irmo said to them all. "Let's go out of this dark dungeon, shall we?"

Varda took Manwë's hand in her long, warm fingers. "Come, my love. It is time for us to go home..."

 

"...And to destroy this pitiful place," the Elder Queen looked at the huge facade of the fortress, a part of a mountainhill. One could see the damage already done to it - it seemed that a battle was fought here. Manwë looked around, at the faces of his beloved friends. All of them were there, all but Oromë. Melkor was standing between them, but Tulkas was holding his hands and Nessa was standing nearby, ready to put a barrier around him. The land around them - the mountains and high hills of the North, bore signs of a great battle. Manwë ws wondering for how long Melkor's forces was fighting them back. Yet now no one was here to defend the dark Ainu. Many fleed, others were destroyed or defeated.

"Manwë?" asked Namo. "Do you wish to start?"

"Please, no!" Manwë was surprised by the panicked sound of his voice. "No," he added a bit calmer. "It is the dwelling of my brother. I couldn't destroy it."

Varda turned to look at him, worry in her eyes.

"We cannot leave this place," Namo spoke from under his hood. "I am sure you understand it."

"Yes, but still..."

"Proceed," Varda said, her voice cloear in the cold air of the North. "And let Manwë, Tulkas, Nessa and me take Melkor to a prison where he will wait for our judgement."

"I will accompany you," the Judge said. "My power is not to destroy things and Halls of Mandos are ready to keep Melkor within."

Varda looked around and, as everyone else nodded in agreement, led Manwë away from Utumno and the dark past hidden within the earth. Tulkas and the rest followed them. Manwë let Varda lead him, thankful that she took control over everything. He himself had too conflicted thoughts right now. And he was thankful she understood he didn't want to see Melkor's home fall, that he couldn't destroy it because it was his brother's... Even if this place was a lair of darkness, where many sins had been commited. Melkor gave a small whimper as they felt the ground under their feet tremble - Aulë and the other Ainur started theur labor.

Manwë could hear so much in this single, quiet noise! Fear mixed with disbelief, loss and confusion. This one sound pierced Manwë's heart, but he couln't bring himself to look at his brother. He knew what was to come - the judgement. And as the Elder King he was the one to speak the sentence for Melkor's sins and mistakes.

He was the one to punish Melkor. To hurt his twin.

Varda squeezed his fingeers and he lifted his gaze to look into her worried eyes. "You knew this day would happen," she spoke to him in his mind.

"Yes," he replied in the same manner, letting her witness his mixed emotions. She was quiet for a long while.

"If you want to I can judge him," she offered, her voice soft and full of compassion. He shook his head.

"Iluvatar made me his steward, his hand within Arda. It must be me," he spoke. The mere sond of those words broke his heart. He felt as if it was him who was sentenced to suffer a severe punishment.

"True. But you are not alone in this," she replied. Manwë realised how lucky he was, having his wife and friends. And how unlucky and lonely Melkor was - he had many servants, but was there any being he could call a friend or a beloved one? Had he someone to worry about him, risk everythig for him?

He looked back at Melkor, walking between other Valar. He could see how much effort his brother was putting in remainig quiet and carrying his head high. But his shuulders were shaking and his fists were clenched. He was bitting his pale lips. 

Manwë couldn't know those weren't signs of fear, but rage.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "The love we both had for each other"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took ages because Manwe didn't want me to finish this chapter.   
> There is only one left (a little bonus thing), which is already written and will be posted soon.

The throne room of Ilmarin was empty. Manwë, clad in blue robes, with a white mantle covering his shoulders, walked from the door to the center of the room. He had no crown, nor a scepter - not yet. He stood there, quietly looking at twin thrones under a huge white banner. The thrones were but simple chairs, finely made, but not adorned with gems or other ornaments. The whole throne room was like this - it lacked the rich splendor of an audience room. He knew it had to change - one day. 

He heard light footsteps and a person stood beside him. It was Elentari, clad in dark blue robe with stars embroided on the hem of it. Her hair - now grey as a sign of her sadess - was braided in a crown on top of her head. Her fair eyes were looking at him. 

"Manwë, love of my heart," she spoke and took his hand. "Two are roles you play on Arda. One is of the lord of Airs, free and caring, full of compassion. And the other is of the Elder King, just and merciful, the ruler we can trust, the leader all of us can follow."

He nodded in silence, letting her melodious voice ring in his ears, fill the silence of his mind.

"You love your brother and it is the most noble of you to wish to help him, to forgive him," she continued, "Yet you must act as our King now, Manwë. You must remember about all those things he did against the Law and the Plan. We understand how confused and sad you feel and we are here for you. It is not like we hate him. He did a lot of things we hate, but he is one of us, an Ainu. Even if he rebelled against Iluvatar and marred the Music."

"Yeah, she speaks what we think!" Manwë turned around to see Aulë standing in the opened door. Ulmo was at his side. Two of his best friends approached the couple. The Smith was short and muscular, yet his footsteps were as light as Varda's. "We came to fetch you and bring you to the council. Namo and Estë will read the list of his deeds and he will have a chance to speak in his defense."

"And then we will help you to find the best way of acting," Ulmo said, stroking his beard and brushing off it a few shells which fell to the floor. He was known to rarely come and visit Valinor, yet now he was here, right beside him. Manwë felt grateful for having so caring friends, who were always here for him. He was not alone, there were others willing to help him, to support him in his choices.

Manwë looked at them all, feeling the tension and confusion leave him, at least for this moment. And this second he felt strong arms of the Smith wrap around his waist as Aulë squeezed him in his own version of a reassuring hug.

***

The air within Máhanaxar was still and any being requiring breathing to survive would find it difficult there. Manwë was sitting on his throne carved in stone, on his right hand was Varda, on his left Ulmo. On thr thrones on the other side of the circle Feanturi were sitting and between her brothers Nienna was weeping. Her grey hood was covering her face, but Manwë could see the wet stains on her robe. She was crying for all those who suffered because of Melkor's misdeeds.

And for the love we both had for each other, thought Manwë as he looked at the person kneeling before his throne. Melkor was blindfolded, but he could sense who was where around him, could recognize voices and auras of other Ainur. His hands and legs were chained with Angainor, the chain seemed to be too heavy for his fragile fana. Yet Melkor seemed to be calm, focusing to look like a noble king, not a captive waiting for a judgement. Yet Manwë knew the truth, could see the small signs of fear, sense the shallow breath of his brother. As Namo laid down the scroll with all Melkor's misdeeds a small breeze blew through the area, as Manwë realized he himself was holding his own breath. So many wrong things done by one person, so much suffering and havoc...

No one dared to break the silence, there was no motion in sight - the whole land seemed to hold its breath, waiting for him, the Elder King, to speak, to pass his judgement, to state the punishment.

Thank you, Eru, that I don't need to look in Melkor's eyes, thought the younger brother of Melkor, looking at his fellow Valar instead, reading their eyes. On the place opposite to Manwë's was Namo, his face was stern, he had finished reading the long list of Melkor's misdeeds, he had nothing more to add. Irmo's expression was softer, but there was no doubt he was willing to punish Melkor, his usually dreamy look disappeared. Vairë and Estë sent him similar thoughts as their spouses.

The Elder King glanced at his own spouse and in her starry eyes saw only one thing - her everlasting love for elves and desire to protect them. Melkor had hurt her beloved Firstborn and she would never forgive him. Ulmo and Oromë, who grew to love the elves as well sent Manwë their thoughts, similar to Varda's. They would forgive Melkor only after seeing him change and atone for his sins. Manwë understood them well.

It was just like Varda had told him - all of the Valar were willing to punish Melkor and bring an end to his wrong doings. They wanted him to realize how wrong his path was and change his behavior Even in Manwë's heart was a desire to stop his older brother, to bring peace to Arda and make Melkor realize how wrong he was about so many things. It seemed Melkor sensed this, for he bowed his head before Manwë.

"Brother, please..." his voice was weak. "D-don't let them hurt me!"

Manwë felt as if something was tearing his heart, his core, to pieces. A gentle hand touched his fingertips and he felt Varda's mind wrap around his own protectively. 

"Look and see what is wrong and what is right," he heard her thought. "As his brother you are fit to pass the just judgement, as our leader and the steward of Iluvatar you are the one who is the most suited to speak it aloud. You heard the Doomsman, you heard our opinions, you know the answer."

"Brother..." started Melkor, his voice was shaking, its melody so different from the melody Manwë knew so well.

Manwë's eyelids fell closed.

"Guilty."

This one word, so much anticipated by the rest, so simple and yet so hard. The word which drove him and his twin further apart, which seemed at the same time right and wrong. A sudden gust of wind shook the branches of the Two Trees growing nearby, Laurelin's light danced around the Valar, but no one looked away to admire it. 

"No!" this was Melkor's voice, full of emotions he wanted to hide so badly. Manwë wanted to leave this place, to hide and cry for his heart was aching and he couldn't bear the sight of his brother, the sound of his voice. Yet it wasn't done yet, Máhanaxar had to hear the whole sentence.

"You, Melkor, shall be kept captive within Mandos, Namo's halls, for three centuries. You shall not leave your cell for this time. And when it passes you shall stand here again and be judged again. If you change, if you realize your sins, you shall be freed."

Melkor raised his head as if he could see his younger brother.

"No, don't! Don't do this! I don't want to be locked away!" he cried. "Little brother, I beg of you!"

"The King spoke words of wisdom and justice," Namo's voice was cold and calm like stones of his mansion. "You shall dwell within my house for three centuries and contemplate your choices."

"So let it be written, so let it be done," Vairë stood up following her spouse's lead. The rest of the Valar stood up as well, repeating this line, agreeing with the sentence. Manwë was looking at them, unable to bear the sight of his brother on his knees, crying for mercy. He couldn't approach him and embrace him, tell him this was the merciful path. That there could be something worse than spending this time in Mandos. 

As Nienna voiced her agreement and sobbed, feeling pity not only for the world, but also Melkor, Manwë realized one thing - they felt pain to keep Melkor captive too, yet they knew it was the right thing to do. They knew it was hard for him to judge his brother, but were gad he found strength to do it - they knew how hard it was. He could notice that Eonwë and one of Tulkas' Maiar lifted Melkor from the ground without causing him pain and pulling at his chains. They felt pity for him, for the first of the Ainur - and Manwë was sure Melkor was aware of it.

Please, brother, accept our feelings towards you, accept them and see we do not look down at you, we feel for you, we want you to change back to your older self, Manwë thought, watching his broher being taken away and Tulkas and Oromë following Namo and Vaireë who were leading the pair of the Maiar to Mandos' Halls. Please, see where you did wrong and start again, start as one of us, take your rightful place among us. We want to create with you, grow with you... We want to support you and talk to you... My brother... Forgive me.

Heavy clouds covered the sky and rain fell when the Vala of Airs felt Elentari's hand on his own again and let himself cry.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When cold breeze comes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a gift for honooxtama from tumblr  
> Hope you like it.

The meadow was full of life - small birds were flying around, jumping between flowers and leaves on trees encircling the glade. A small brook was flowing through this area, hidden in tall, green grass. The air was full of scents of flowers and dirt, fresh and warm. 

Manwë was sitting on a blanket, admiring the soft breeze and holding a cookie in one hand. On his other hand he had a bird sitting, singing to him about nestlings in its nest. The atmosphere was full of life, harmony and peace. 

"Hey, bird brain!" Manwë lifted his head to see a tall figure approaching. They were clad in a black robe adorned with red and silver snakes. Their hair was flowing behind his back like mane of a wild horse or flames.

"Hello, brother. Please, don't call me this name, alright?" Manwë smiled softly as the other Ainu stopped beside him. "Come and sit with me, I have cookies," he gestured to a basket sitting upon the blanket next to him. Melkor gave a nod and sat down, facing the Sun and smiling as its rays warmed his face. His hand, bearing no signs of burn marks, reached into the basket to pick three chocolate cookies. The Vala of Airs inhaled deeply - the world was as it should be.

"I visited Aulë and told him that his mountains are boring. Especially the Blue Mountains," Melkor said, stuffing a cookie in his mouth between sentences. "He got annoyed, but listened to my suggestions, so I think he may make a volcano or two there."

"A volcano?" Manwë tilted his head, mirroring the motion of the bird on his hand.

"Yeah. And if he doesn't I will make one myself," Melkor gave him a mischevious smile and lifted a finger. "Don't tell him, it'll be a surprise."

"Oh, okay," Manwë nodded and ate the rest of his cookie before reaching for a next one. "Did you meet with Nessa? She told me she wants to see you."

"Yeah," Melkor nodded. "I went to her this morning."

Two brothers were sitting in silence for a moment, peacefully eating their cookies. Then Melkor smiled at Manwë and sat closer to him to rest his head on Manwë's shoulder.

"I am glad to be with you again," he said. "We don't always agree, but it is still nice to be able to actually talk to you and see you."

Manwë gave a nod, feeling love and joy fill his heart. He touched Melkor's mind to find those chaotic, always changing patterns of thoughts, mixed emotions and mischevious nature. He knew things weren't perfect, but they had time to learn now, to grow wiser and more understanding of each other. He was determined to mediate between Melkor and the rest of the Ainur, to make it work.

He couldn't lose his twin again. 

"I love you," he confessed the obvious thing. Melkor chuckled.

"I know, little brother," he said, still resting his head against Manwë's shoulder, looking at clouds in the sky. "We will be always together since now, don't worry, bird brain," he added, grinning. Manwë smiled and nudged his side with his elbow, playfully.

"Don't call me that!"

"I will call you whatever I want to!" Melkor stated, laughing at his brother's expression.

A cold breeze came, sweeping through the meadow and Manwë froze, tasting it, analyzing it. It was different from the air around them. It was... 

The meadow disappeared in grey mist and Manwë lifted his hand to call wind to blow the mist away. And as it did the Vala found himself sitting upon his stone throne in the Circle of Doom. The rest of the thrones were empty, but he wasn't alone. Melkor was kneeling before him, chained and blindfolded. Black blood was dripping from his wounds and marring the white stones onder his fana.

"Guilty," Manwë heard his own voice utter this one word, the one word he didn't want to say. Melkor lifted his head and the scarf covering his face disappeared. Manwë looked straight into his balazing eyes filled with pride, fear, hate and rage mixed together. He could see the expression on Melkor's face. The Vala wanted to lift his hand and say something, but found himself unable to move. He could just watch Melkor.

"How could you do this to me? To your twin?" he asked. "You traitor!"

"I had no choice. You did so many wrong things..." Manwë managed to whisper. Melkor stood up, prideful and angry. Chains were still enfolding his fana, but they were hanging loosely from his shoulders, wrapping around his chest and hips.

"I was doing what I was supposed to do! I am the Ainu of chaos, the creator of the second melody!" he said. "I wanted to be free, to influence Arda, and you chained me and locked away from it! You, who should understand me the best! You who should love and trust me."

The Vala lowered his head, feeling guilty and in pain. He was right, Manwë was a terrible brother - a traitor. But how could he do anything else? He had to stop Melkor. He had to.

"I am so sorry," Manwë whispered and approached his brother. He wanted to embrace him, comfort him, but realized that Melkor didn't want him close. He didn't want him to touch him. Manwë stopped just before his brother, not sure what to do. Guilt and pain filled his heart, almost choked him.

"You betrayed me thrice, Manwë," stated the dark Ainu. "You took from me everything I loved and you think I could forgive you and call my brother again. We will not speak again, we will not be together again. You lost your chance."

"Please, Melkor, I can't lose you... Not again," Manwë felt tears running down his cheeks.

"You lost me long ago," Melkor replied, lifting both hands to show him the chins. Insides of his hands were burned. "You chose to follow Eru, not me. May you never forget this." Melkor's voice was more like a growl, more like a vile hiss, than actual voice of a person.

A cold breeze came, sweeping through the Circle of Doom and Manwë realized it was different than the air around him. It was carrying the scent of home. It was... 

Real.

***  
There were no trees around him, no birds and no flowers. And no Melkor, chuckling and calling him silly names.  
There were no stone thrones and no stillness of the place of judgement. And no Melkor, chained and calling him a traitor.

He was curled in a ball under a blanket in his bed. White walls were covered with tapestries depicting forests and lakes. The ceiling was a starry sky. A soft breeze was filling the air with sweet, fresh scent of flowers from a garden. He looked in direction of a window. A tall figure was standing there, long hair falling on her back like a waterfall of grey mist. 

He stood up and approached her, wrapping his arms around her slender waist as he stood behind her. She looked up at him, her dark eyes clouded with worry and sadness. He knew already she was sad - for everytine she was sad her hair was no longer glowing silver, but grey and dark. After a second she relaxed in his embrace and rested her back against his chest. Her warm hands covered his in a comforting gesture. They both looked outside of their chamber in Ilmarin. Their eyes were not looking at mundane things, nor at the starry skies. They were looking at the Door of Night.

"You were dreaming about him," she whispered after a long time. "Again."

He could hear in her voice she felt sorry for him and wasn't upset because of his feelings for his brother, but because she knew how much pain Melkor had caused him. He knew she hated Melkor more than anything. Still, because she loved Manwë, she was careful never to speak badly about the Dark Ainu.

"Yes," he nodded. "I wish my dream could be real... And reality but a nightmare. Yet..." he fell silent. She knew how much he desired his brother to return to them. She knew much more than any other Ainu about Manwë and Melkor. She understood their bond.

"Yet he chose his path and walked in darkness," she finished for him. "And none of us could change him back."

Manwë realized he was crying when Varda turned in his arms and wiped tears from his cheeks.

"You two are simiar in this - both stubborn. He would do everything against Iluvatar, you would do anything to help him. Yet you couldn't save him from himself."

"I know."

But it doesn't make it easier.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: All places and characters belong to J. R. R. Tolkien (unless stated otherwise)  
> I am not a native speaker and have a bad case of dysgraphia. If you find a mistake in any of my texts feel free to send me a pn about that and I will fix it.


End file.
